I saw her sitting and smiling by herself
I asked what future her smile is cast
“Not future” she said, “but the past, the past..”
We rarely look at the future and smile at moments we are going to live, but always reflect back at the past and smile. This snap is perfect for this thought. Thanks Priya for posing so well!
The past has so many glorious moments.
I remember the time when with very little money in our pockets we used to go to GMC (Goa Medical College) canteen, and for Rs 25 we would fill ourselves (2 people) with 2 mango drinks and a plate of channa masala (gravy dish) with extra parantha (bread) that we would share. That was much more joyful/fun than any meal I can easily afford today.
I remember how once during new year we had Rs 50 in our pockets, as we said no to all pubs and bars and events (having no money), and after driving aimlessly for hours, landed up buying a 180ml bottle of whiskey (the cheapest was DSP) for the first time. How we unscrewed the bottle to find the entire car smelling of cheap liquor (thats exactly how I remember it. It was so bad), and how we took one sip and threw it in a garbage bin. And consoled ourselves that we would make some poor rag-pickers day when he finds it.
I remember getting drunk the first time, at a friends house party. Sleeping in the kitchen with noodles all over me. I am not ashamed of it. Its a moment I enjoy thinking about all the time.
I remember the first salary in my hand, it made me more happy than the multiple times I earn now, I remember spending my first salary and the sense of freedom it gave.
I remember purchasing my bike, that was more fun than the car I bought later. I remember the endless moments I spend riding every part of Goa with friends. I remember my friend helping me with the paperwork (I did not have proper identification papers with the new house address). I remember riding it in all seasons, in the rain, and the sun, to pickup a friend at the railway station, to going triple seat to watch a movie, to pushing it for kms when it did not work, to meeting with an accident. The bike is sold now. I will always miss it.
I remember entering cafe coffee day with close friends the first time in Banglore. None of us knew how expensive the coffee would be and after a 15 min discussion, we decided to enter (with a deal that if its too expensive we would drink water and run away). It was a big relief to see it priced within our budget. We ordered tropical iceberg. We loved it so much, that we ordered another round. Cold Coffee has never been as good! We still talk about this whenever we meet.
There are many such moments, and as bright as the future is, the past will always continue to bring a smile.
The new year made a lot of my friends ask themselves and me if 2012 was a good year? or for that matter the year before. A lot of them answered no. Then one of my friend said that the reason we are not happy is because we set the standard so high. I think thats a good point.
For me it was a good year (not that my standards are low!), and I look forward to the year ahead.
Happy new year everyone!